?

Log in

 
 
01 September 2008 @ 09:56 pm
 
I had my first shower in weeks. I can't think of a single thing that could have felt better.

Iever came to visit today. I don't know how he did it, but he made good work of my hair. It had gotten to the point where, Cid's opinion or no, I would have had to cut it all off.

We spoke for a time, but not too deeply. That's for the best. As cowardly as I am, I don't... think I'm ready yet, to face what I had sunk to. What my madness had reduced me to. Though I do have to, to a degree, and soon...

But Iever is doing well, happy, and relatively healthy. Quip is so good for him. They love each other without exception, and that is a rare and precious thing; and I do believe, that my son, my son, deserves that and more. And Quip also, I suppose; he has led a hard life also, and is a good man.

I haven't seen anyone else, for which I'm grateful. I'm... just not ready.

I'm too thin. I'm running on reserves. I know... I know I'll have to eat soon. Not just for me. But for him, too.
 
 
 
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 05:17 am (UTC)
Cid enters his cabin carrying a tray. There's a bowl of steaming broth, some juice, a sliced skinned apple, dried crackers and cream cheese on a bagel. Cid concentrates on not spilling any of it as he puts it on the table.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 05:25 am (UTC)
Vincent's napping lightly, which is most of what he does these past few days, sprawled out on his back, chest rising and falling evenly.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 05:33 am (UTC)
Cid pulls off his gloves and goggles, and takes a careful seat on the bed. He brushes his fingers through the now silky smooth black hair, and down Vincent's thin face. He remembered when the cheeks used to be rounder, softer.

"Vince, hey, wakey wakey Sleepin' Beauty."
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 05:38 am (UTC)
Vincent shifts as he comes awake, blinking Cid into focus.

"Hi. How long have I been out?"
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 05:40 am (UTC)
"Few hours," Cid says dismissively. "Sit up, I brought ye some food."
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 05:47 am (UTC)
Vincent pauses in the act of elbowing himself up. He swallows back saliva. "Food?"
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 05:49 am (UTC)
"Few different things," Cid says, getting up to grab the tray. "You don't gotta eat it all, just thought we'd try some of it, alright? See if anythin' caught yer fancy..." He sounds far too casual, avoided looking at Vincent. It was obvious Vincent's lack of appetite was really worrying the Captain.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 05:55 am (UTC)
Vincent pushes himself up against the pillows as Cid brings the tray. He swallows again and says nothing.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 05:57 am (UTC)
Cid darts a look up at Vincent from under worried blond brows. He looks back down at the tray, showing off the selection. "Anythin' appeal much?" He asks softly.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 06:01 am (UTC)
"Everything looks wonderful," he says, and for the most part he's being honest. On a normal day, he'd eat all of it and be looking forward to more at lunch.
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 06:05 am (UTC)
Cid smiles sadly. "Hey," he says, "No one's expectin' miracles here, Vincent, alright? Small steps walk the path fer big improvements. Ye want some juice?" He holds up the glass of juice.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 06:11 am (UTC)
Vincent nods, taking the juice - but as he drinks, he eyes the things on the tray, and uses the juice as a stall to keep from progressing with the meal.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 06:15 am (UTC)
Cid notices the tiny sips at the juice, but doesn't discourage Vincent. Anything was better than nothing at this stage, and sooner or later Vincent would have to stop drinking, or run out of juice.

He breaks a cracker in half. "How 'bout somethin' light, te soak the juice up?" He asks, eating the other half himself.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 06:32 am (UTC)
Vincent takes the cracker, and brings it up to his mouth, jerkily, as if he had to fight himself physically. He takes a tiny bite off the edge, licking at it, then forces himself to take a bigger bite. He closes his eyes as he does it, feeling his throat tighten and eyes sting.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 06:35 am (UTC)
"It's okay, it's okay, Vince," Cid says, reaching out and gently taking the cracker back. He puts the food on the bedside table and sits up next to the gunman so he can be more supportive, less face-to-face intimidating. He brushes away the wetness from Vincent's eyes with his thumb. "Good work, Vincent, yer doing great. How ye feeling?"
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 06:43 am (UTC)
Vincent swallows back the small mouthful like it was crushed glass - though at this point, he might have taken better to the glass. He nods, and raises his glass, taking a few more sips. He pants softly afterward.

"I'm sorry. I can do better than this."
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 08:50 am (UTC)
"Small steps," Cid reminds with a soft, caring smile. He tugs Vincent closer against him. "Why don't we try some soup, maybe that'll be easier, since you seem to be handling the juice okay?"
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 09:02 am (UTC)
Vincent's stomach turns over, but he nods.
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 09:12 am (UTC)
Cid picks up the cooling bowl of soup and rests it in Vincent's lap, the spoon sitting in the bowl, waiting. Daunting.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 09:19 am (UTC)
Vincent stares at the soup in his lap, and feels like he's going to swoon. He can already taste it in his mouth, cold and oily and too salty. There was too much of it. It was too heavy.

As if in a dream, his hand feeling weak, he scoops up a spoonful of the soup, and brings it to his mouth. He hesitates, swallowing sickly, then pours it into his mouth and gulps it down. It tasted as fetid and heavy as he thought it would. He could feel his stomach expanding.

He couldn't do this. He had to. He had to.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 09:24 am (UTC)
Cid can see the look of nauseas repulsion on Vincent's face. Byron had said Vincent used to like the soup. Maybe he mixed up some of the ingredients...?

Cid dips a finger into the soup and brings it to his mouth. It tastes warm and delicious. He flashes Vincent a worried look.

"Alright?" He asks, knowing it isn't.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 09:33 am (UTC)
"I can do this," he says softly, gulping. "I can do this. I need to do this." His fingers flex on the spoon, but don't bring up another mouthful. He eyes the bowl like a pit viper in his hand.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 09:39 am (UTC)
"Shhh, it's okay, would it be easier if we dipped the cracker in...?"
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 09:43 am (UTC)
Vincent bows his head, clenching the spoon. He shakes his head.
Cid: serioussmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 09:46 am (UTC)
"Here," Cid says, taking the soup bowl back. He sets it near his hip and lies them back, snuggled together along the length of his bed. He pets Vincent's hair, looking up at the ceiling.

"I ever tell ye 'bout the time I set fire te a customer's car, back when I were an apprentice mechanic?"
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 09:50 am (UTC)
Vincent lies back with him, closing his eyes and breathing easier with the threat of the soup removed. He relaxes at Cid's side. He shakes his head.
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 09:57 am (UTC)
"Complete 'n'total goddamn accident, o' course.. See, this old geezer..." Cid starts spinning the tale of his youth. He's a good story-teller, and his voice is familiar and easy to listen to. After a while, he dips two fingers in the soup, enough just to get them wet. He brings them to Vincent's mouth and gently brushes them over Vincent's lips.

"That's when we all smelt the smoke..."
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 10:01 am (UTC)
Vincent doesn't so much as jerk back at the warm, wet touch, too lulled by Cid's voice. He mouths the fingers, tasting the soup, but also Cid's skin, the reassuring strength of his hands as they pressed to his mouth. And Cid's still talking, still telling the story, so he pays attention, listens closely as his tongue winds sinuously about his fingers.
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 10:05 am (UTC)
Cid pets Vincent rewardingly with his other hand. He takes his fingers away, going to dip for more soup. He continues with the story, bringing his fingers back to Vincent's mouth.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 10:12 am (UTC)
Vincent draws the fingers into his mouth, sucking them absently, tongue twining between them. The flavor wasn't so strong this way; it wasn't so heavy on his stomach.
Cid: mesmokin_highwind on September 2nd, 2008 10:18 am (UTC)
Cid kept it up. The steady telling of his story. When one ended, he'd pick up another, sometimes related, sometimes not so much. Sometimes they'd be about him, his past, or what had happened lately on the ship - the few happy stories he knew of - or other stories other people had told him over his life. All the while he'd wet his fingers in his soup, and bit by bit, feed it to Vincent.
Vincent Valentinebeastunderneath on September 2nd, 2008 10:31 am (UTC)
Vincent keeps lapping up the soup as Cid brings it to his mouth, mindless, as if hypnotised by his voice and presence. Once Cid has decided he'd had enough, he set the soup aside, and made them more comfortable in the bed. He continued to talk story, and pet the flagging gunman until he fell asleep at his side. Even after, he stayed, just enjoying the luxury of having Vincent be so quiet and restful against him.